Why do I Still go to Wal-Mart?

It seems every time I find myself in a Wal-Mart store, as I am leaving I tell myself “Never again!” Unfortunately, I have a short memory and end up back at Wal-Mart a couple of weeks later, where I repeat those same words to myself again.

I stopped at Wal-Mart after work on Friday. I parked a mile away, as usual, and walked past 45 handicap spots (I counted them). Most of the spots were empty and the cars that were in those spaces were probably people parked illegally, people who are not handicapped but driving their grandmother’s car, or people who have no trouble walking but our government classifies them as a handicap because they were able to file the request form. My grandmother had a handicap parking permit for her car because she was blind. What?????

I believe our government, in its infinite wisdom, probably requires Wal-Mart to have one handicap spot for every two regular spots because the government loves making rules and because nobody ever bothered checking how ridiculous that rule really is. I could not find the actual requirement online, because I didn’t bother to look, but I am sure my reasoning is either right or wrong.

The reason I went to Wal-Mart in the first place was to pick up flowers for Rose. I knew she didn’t have a vase at work so I thought I could get both the flowers and the vase there. Sure enough, as I walked in the door, the flowers were right there but there was not a vase in sight. I guess that would make too much sense putting the vases near the flowers. Its better to have the customers go searching in hopes that they will find something else to buy.

It worked. I picked up some fruit, which I was going to buy anyway, so I guess it didn’t really work. I then went on safari for the elusive vases. I thought I spotted them in housewares but I was wrong. They can be elusive creatures but fortunately Wal-Mart has several guides to help people on their quest. unfortunately, those guides are as elusive as the very vases I was looking for.

Alas, after a long and exhausting search, I ran out of time and had to give up. At least I had my fruit. Now came the worst part of my trip: standing in line.

The Wal-Mart planners did one thing right; they put in 52 cash registers because they knew that these supercenters get very busy and they needed plenty of cash registers to keep the customers happy and coming back. Of course, somewhere between the planning and actual implementation, something went very wrong. I don’t think I have ever been to Wal-Mart and seen more than 10 registers open at one time. Usually, when I am there, I see two or three registers open on one end and two or three at the other end, so if the lines are long, you could take the long walk to the other side, but since you can’t see that far there is no way to know what you are getting into.

Finally, after a ten minute wait in line, I headed out the store thinking, “Never again!”

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